Being me.

Friday, June 16, 2006

i dont get it, i thought it would make my mind and thoughts clearer, instead i have become much more confused than before. i dunno what to think anymore. i am thinking too much, stop thinking so much! those voices in my head.. make it stop. really makes me wonder if i really still....you

poof;
time;4:04 AM

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Tuesday, June 13, 2006

gosh i haven benn blogging lately.. feeling kinda lazy and everytime i book out i am likegoing out so often with different groups of pple. even had to suddenly cacel meetings with frens i'd already agreed to meet, argh well so sorry, will make it up to u guys sometime. but yea alls well in the wasted life of shaun right now. block leave!! finally left tekong and completed my guard duty..man i am sure gonna miss scorpion company.

wonder y so many other companies dun like us, well like my PC said, we do things differently in scorpion, we believe in giving recruits enough rest so they can give their best during training, unlike some other companies whole day marching getting punished but end up losing to us in everyting, they juz dun get it. well results speak for themselves yea? IPPT results best in tekong, shooting 100% pass, games day 3rd, drill comp 2nd, tug of war 1st.. RAAH.. well to all the others who are so proud of surviving the daily ass-whooping by sergents everyday well.. ok so u can eat shit without making a face, but can you produce the results when its most needed? =) so rock on scorpion coy!! finally something i am really proud of saying i was a part of.

posting is coming out on the 16th, i have a funny feeling tt ill become a dumbass rifleman, if tt happens ill try my best to downgrade to a clerk, all the brainwashing about singapore is great, love of the country, defending our homeland.. pulling us guys away for 2 yrs during our most fun chapter of our life, shaving us bald making us sing stupid army propaganda songs, screw you. will migrate the instant the opprtunity presents itself.

poof;
time;12:09 AM

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Monday, May 15, 2006

hey guess wad.. i got to book out on a monday, well id rather not book out and i wud rather keep the reason behind it to myself. man this sucks so badly, army is not helping at all, past memories keep rushing back into my head. its that feeling of looking back at all those tomes i spent with her and smiling to myself, was really one of the best times i had, and the agoising pain of reality that strikes me that its all over cus of my stupidity. if *you are reading this, i am truely sorry if i hav hurt you in any way, and even thou i noe things wud nvr be the same agin, but i hope ur happy whereever you are, and i still miss u loads.

less than 3 weeks left, living it day by day activity by activity, army is sort of transforming me into this boring fella, of mayb i just get bored too easily nowadays, even wen going out with some people. somehow i know the answer deep down, but am i man enough to face up to it.. i really dont know

poof;
time;6:44 PM

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Friday, May 12, 2006

gosh i haven posted in ages.. partly becuz i kinda forgot my own blog address, haha kinda stupid ya. well army has been ok so far. field camp being the most "difficult" its like all of us pratically didnt bathe for 7days, and i swear there was this crust of dirt encasing me. at least my section mates r cool, we pass day by day toking cock during trainings and dota during the night, heh.

and i realise army has like made us appreciate home and our loved ones so much, its like every1 is always looking 4ward to bookout day, and there is nth worse than being confined, spending another 2 days on a damn island filled with men who spew profanities as often as they blink their eyes. army life and language is simple, it can be simply be described by the most used adjetive or noun or wad not-fuck/fuked-up. cheers =)

o yea.. and i got silver for my ippt mock test.. haha, big improvement

poof;
time;2:05 PM

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Thursday, April 06, 2006

gosh, time really flies by, and tml will be my last day before i am gone. mixed feelings inside me, part of me is just not ready to let go of everything, to leave everyone behind, its just too sudden. tekong awaits and this feeling of helplessness causes a tinge of sadness to creep in, about what? about who? i cant say, but i am gonna miss everyone and everything, especially my way of life. remb to msg me while i am still in tekong k! or ill really turn gay surrounded by all those guys. well take care people!! promise i'll catch up with everyone after my hair falls out and i am out of confinement.. till then dont stop having fun and wrecking havock!! =)

RAAAAHHH!!!

poof;
time;12:23 PM

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Sunday, April 02, 2006

haha! i just had the craziest primary school runion chalet ever!! ian was so dam funny and we caused so much havock, just like old times eh? ahhh, memories memories.. we met up for pool 1st, decided to go to the bbq later, but they called and ask us to buy, charcoal, fire starter, paper plates.. i mean wtf, so what the hell did u fellas buy??

well all they had was a 5kg chicken and a tub of butter. so we told them to take the butter and shove it up the chicken's ass and then take the chicken and shove it up their ass. i realised thaT beer and instant noodles tastes horrible, too bad we didnt buy enough to get anyone drunk or high. broke a marble statue at costa sands sentosa, hahaha ian tried 2 carry it to the bbq pit, it fell and the head broke off, well it sure looked better in an artistic way, what a beautiful disaster. then you wei came with his frens in two custom made mitsubitshi evos.. omg his cars are so cool!! custom everything!! from the engine to the floorboards inside. then we had a street race, i was in you wei's car, the winning car! =D man was like sitting in a jet taking off, i suspect he has nitro in his car, bloody bugger..

stayed over in town after that, had to ditch the class beach outing, i was just too shagged after that, i waited till like 9am in town, but outing was at 11am, damn i cant endure that long, sorry guyz.

bowling today was alright, haha shang!! you owe me 2 bucks, i told you cathy would turn up!! whole chunk of skin came off my finger and i bowled like crap too. so much for bowling nx week with the ex cjc team.

seeing her again make me, ughh i dunno, maybe its time i should do something. i cant sleep, i miss her and all those times so damn much.

poof;
time;7:24 PM

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Monday, March 27, 2006

i hav so many things to look forward to, man i just cant wait. cant wait for NS, went 2 make my new geeky specs today, i am gonna look so cool, next week i am gonna shave bald!! yea, gonna hav my full NS look complete, i am ready to leave everything behind for 2 years!! yea, no more looking back. bumped into ian today, he called shawn in NS and told him "hey man, my family and i would like to thank you for letting my family sleep peacefully at night knowing that you are keeping our country safe and sound" well he got an equally pleasing reply "FUCK YOU!!"

o yea check this out http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cV9evBNn2QA&search=ninja
some cool fella jumping over buildings, ya hoo, crazy is good.

wow i realised my schedue is pretty packed for this week, and that is the way i want it it be, enjoying myself all the way till i enlist. thur i hav a ex HPPS 6f class of 99 reunion chalet, man that is gonna be great, cant wait for that, although i probably cant reconise half of the people turning up, but it will be a great start catching up all over again. then on fri my cjc klass is having a bitch outing, i mean beach outing also at sentosa, well i am not exactly jumping up and down with excitement for that one but since its also held at sentosa and i'll most probably be staying over, so why not drop by and hav a look at the pathetic losers? anyway i need to get my 4 bucks back from colin, haha the main reason why i am turning up, lol kidding, man hope they don't read this. haha, well if the beach thinghy sucks so badly ill just head back to the HPPS chalet =) three cheers for boring people! hip hip.. losers!! hip hip..losers!! hip hip.. hahahaha and on sat ron invited me for some bowling, yea, i am a sucker for bowling, something i cant resist, i am a bowling nut. i am probably gonna look like a fool dragging my gear all the way to the ally while every1 else uses house balls. ughh.. i hope the rest of the OG can make it, for once. and if on sat i feel uneasy or uncomfortable, well i am not going to say the reason, but if that happens ill head down to ben's place straightaway for his housewarming.

yea, plans plans plans and more back-up plans.. well this may seem very i dunno, "pang seh-ish" but i dont care. i hav realised there are 2 groups of people in my life, those you can count on and those who will ony share your joy but will nvr be there in times of need, so screw off. no more playing mr nice guy for me, i am done and finished pleasing others while i get crap in return.

awwww.. feeling pissed at what i said? oh my god! why is shaun being such a bitch? o man what is wrong with him?? well if you hav a problem with me right now, chances are i like you just as much =) cheers

poof;
time;9:27 PM

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Sunday, March 26, 2006

In a Past Life...

You Were: A Lazy Beekeeper.

Where You Lived: New Guinea.

How You Died: In Childbirth.

Who Were You In a Past Life?

now izznt this an interesting load of crap..jeez

poof;
time;2:54 PM

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Saturday, March 25, 2006

i hav 3 balls now instead of 2!! woo hoo!! eat that!! nope i didnt grow a tumour in between my legs. i just bought a new bowling ball!! ebonite V2!! woo hoo.. one part of my wish list is fulfilled =) cant wait to test it out tml. PINS!! watch out!! there is a new ball in the house!! *ROAR!!*

ok i hav been doing some thinking.. i got this idea off justice league, hah. but yea here goes, i was jus wondering what would it be like to live your dreams and i mean, really live it. imagine falling asleep and dreaming of something so wonderful and it all feels so real. but after all you are still asleep. whould you rather stay that way forever and ever? in that little fantasy world and never waking up to this place of imperfection? scary izznt it? but wudnt it be just great? and not waking up ever..while you can have everything that your heart has ever desired. wudnt it be pure bliss?

poof;
time;11:08 PM

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Its frigging 4.45 am and i cant sleep. thoughts racing through my mind like bullets frm a machine gun. i have to question myself why am i still thinking about it, its really driving me mad, slowly but surely, bit by bit, day by day, and i bet you don't even know what you are doing to me. so much confusion, chaos in my mind, i cant think straight, when ever i hav a silent moment to myself your name keeps ringing out in the depths of my mind. i wanna get into NS asap, pls put me in asap, i wanna go in on the 7th, dun fuking make me wait till the 11th, because i cant stand it anymore. maybe being away for 2years from this world will make me forget . i hate you so badly for putting me through all this shit, yet you are like some addictive poison that i cant get enough of, i hate you so bad.

poof;
time;4:44 AM

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yesterdays.
;;x May 2004
June 2004
July 2004
August 2004
September 2004
October 2004
November 2004
December 2004
January 2005
March 2005
April 2005
May 2005
June 2005
March 2006
April 2006
May 2006
June 2006